Salon, the online magazine, has been running a contest to find the worst pitch. Pitching, to those of you untouched by the sinister tendrils of showbiznezz, is the practice of summarizing your movie idea to its barest most marketable essence. The Salon contest was judged by Harvey Weinstein, who was probably relieved that he already knew the quality of the material going in.

The one I would have chosen is as follows, but they’re all pretty good reading.

TITLE:
Christ Rider

AUTHOR:
Michael Olinger

PITCH:
Knight Rider meets The Passion of the Christ.

PREMISE:
A mix-up during the second coming of Christ results in Jesus’ soul being trapped in the supercomputer of the LAPD’s latest high-tech police car. The car belongs to the LAPD’s most decorated officer, Chet Manmeat, a rough-and-tumble loner who’s never had a partner. Together, Chet and his Son of God–possessed automobile form an unstoppable crime-fighting team!

TAGLINE:
Jesus Christ! Super car!

CAST:
Michael Madsen (Chet Manmeat)
Fred Savage (Voice of Christ)
Dennis Farina (The Chief)

All the bad pitches are accompanied by mock-up poster art, just like real-life bad pitches.

-daniel k.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, June 3rd, 2008 at 9:06 am and is filed under General, Motion Pictures. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.